Posts tagged loser
We'll get em next time…
Jul 9th
Have you ever looked deep within yourself? I mean when it happens unintentionally and it’s the last thing you expected to happen. Like when you’re watching a movie and the suspense builds and then bam, Rocky is being tormented by the loss of Apollo. Is there a better encouraging movie character than Rocky? He is always the underdog and I always root for the underdog. I have never viewed myself more than an underdog. I have demons that always seem to keep me from being more. Personally, I have dealt with depression, anxiety, and failure.
I don’t know why I allow these things to sneak up on me.
Yes, I believe these emotions can be prevented. No, I personally won’t take medication to aid myself.
For me I wonder if this happens as a reality check. Like the valley. The mountains aren’t as sweet if you have never stood at the bottom and were forced to look up. I have always likened my life to one of those air filled clowns with weight at the bottom. You know those punching bags for kids that when you punch it, it comes back. I don’t see myself as the punching bag but as the one throwing the punches. Have you ever seen a little kid hit one of those bags and then the clown pops right back up and knocks the kid over?
I always try to control everything. I can throw punches at life over and over and keep the clown at bay but eventually this lifestyle wears me down. And before I know it the bag always comes back and knocks me down. I’m being literal here. I try to control God and like a great boxer he lets me swing, knowing that he will tire me out. He’s the patient one. His patience is where I find peace because I always know he’s in my corner ready to take my mouthpiece out, wipe off my blood, and pat me on the back.
Cool Like Fonzie
May 18th
to be cool or not to be cool. How many people play this option out for everyday activities? I do. I always try to be different than everyone else. It’s a flaw. I want to stand out. For instance:
I will not wear clothes with the name brand publicized boldly. No american eagle, ambercrombie, and definitely no hollister pimping here. I like to buy my clothes from buckle.com. I search for the weird stuff. Luckily my legs are too big and I can’t fit into skinny jeans. I wouldn’t have been cool in the 80’s.
I used to be a Red Sox fan. Before the championship. You know why I rooted for them? Because they sucked. Now everyone wears a Red Sox hat and I refuse to be categorized as a band wagon fan. Now it’s all about the Royals baby.
Music. If it’s on the radio, I am not a big fan. I am an independent label fan. It’s less commercialized and that’s cool with me.
Basically if everybody is doing “it”, I am doing my dandiest to make my own path. Sadly, I am beginning to realize that this mindset is becoming the cool way of thinking. I’m doomed.
Since it’s not cool to be a hardcore follower, you would think that I am Christianity’s go to guy. Nope, this is one thing that makes me uncool.
Routine Dreams
Mar 24th
I have been trying to wrap my mind around this phenomenon with Benaiah and the lion. By the way, Mark Batterson’s book In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day has been some the best encouragement I have ever read. The book itself, has taught me that all my fears are only excuses. It is a must read.
I tend to make things more difficult and complicated than they really are. I am too analytical. And honestly, as I was breaking down these short statements about Benaiah, I thought “this is way out of context.” I mean cmon’ there is no preface or sequel. I don’t think I can legitimately say that God wanted Benaiah to risk his life by attempting to kill a lion. Maybe details were lost in translation. I don’t know. This week as I attempted to lead our life group through a portion of this story, I left shaking my head. I felt like I did the lesson no justice. I bombed. I concluded that I expect God to be literal with me and learned that this has been a mistake that I have been making for a long time.
No God doesn’t want me to jump into a hole and fight off Africanized wild beasts. But I do believe He wants me to take risks. Not risks in light of dictionary.com’s definition. Yes the definition applies but only partly. Where I don’t agree with this definition is the part about loss or failure. If I am truly taking a risk for God and I fail, God still receives glory because I chased the lion. I wouldn’t fail because I still put Him first. The scenario with Benaiah’s lion ordeal, I believe, was part of his routine. I am not saying that this routine was commonplace within this era but that for some reason Benaiah needed to kill this lion. I don’t think he was legally insane, maybe dangerously crazy, but not coo koo. Otherwise David wouldn’t have put him in a position of leadership, right? Of course these are just assumptions from a rookishly wannabe theologian, made thousands of years after the fact.
Just as if I am studying the Bible, Batterson’s entire book should be read to learn of the common thread within all the characters portrayed. That common thread, I believe, is that all the people spoken of had a fear of God.
Benaiah killed the lion despite the obvious odds in the lions favor. I think it is healthy to say that he trusted in his God given ability. This is the principal that I have been missing. Somewhere within the Bible I have read that God will give me the desires of my heart. And I think it is safe to assume, as long as these desires relate to making Him famous, I am good to go. Benaiah’s battle with the lion had to have God’s involvement. Logically, the lion wins every time in this situation. But not this time. Actually this isn’t the only guy in the Bible who could be labeled as roid user. Other men in the Bible have taken out large animals and outnumbered armies. These men were juiced with a fear of God.
I could go on and on about what this “fear of God” is. But I can’t. I would just ramble. Personally I can only attempt to describe MY fear of God. I believe my “lion” is to follow Him completely while living within a “routine”. I hope this is as easily understood for you as well. Check out Proverbs 19:23 MSG. Try to follow along with the latter because what is in my head doesn’t always come out very well through my finger tips.
Because I know Him, I have learned that I have been commanded to follow Him. As I attempt to follow Him, I screw up. My fear of God, thankfully brings my screw ups to my attention. This fear also convicts me to continue to follow and screw up less often. I have found through trial and error that the less I follow, the more I screw up. To follow Him, is when I put Him first in absolutely EVERYTHING I do. This is what I would describe as my routine. That is, everyone was created to worship Him by serving others first and then give Him the glory. No that wasn’t backwards. Serve Him by putting others first and then give Him the glory. This is where I believe I have failed. I have been putting Him first before others (in that I try to learn and gain from Him for my personal benefit by gaining insight that will help my problems) and honestly most of the time I have cut in line before God. To follow Him, or live my life like Him, I must put everyone else first just as Christ did. Again this is just my rationale. Wouldn’t you say that Christ put others first, even before Himself? If this raises hairs, think about it logically, it is all just a simple cycle that in the end glorifies God. All of the above is just my routine.
My “lion” on the other hand, is my dream. You may label your “lion” as calling. I believe my dream/calling is to take my family and our routine into Latin America. This lion/dream/calling, I believe is the point of Batterson’s book. God even wants our dreams as stated in Psalms 20:4. I think a better way to describe this is, adventure. These adventures are the circumstances that are presented to us within our routines. Good or bad. God wants us to let go of our reasoning and make Him famous by attempting to chase our dreams. If we trust Him and continue to live out our routine, God will do what God does.
Christian Ballers…?
Jan 22nd
