Posts tagged dreams
…thinking…
Jun 16th
I have been doing a lot of thinking about future events that I anticipate happening in my life. I have an urgent desire to do my part, concerning Christianity. For most of my historical walk with Christ I have been focused on living right. Or awkwardly put, trying to abstain from all appearances of evil.
I have always been one of those who are drawn to doing what would be considered as “bucking the system.” Speaking from the point of view of everyday life, if I am told “you can’t do it that way” or “it’s always been done this way” and even “it’s not possible” I am ready to jump at the chance to prove these statements as false. I have failed and succeeded within all of these circumstances but I believe, the majority of the time, my intentions are good.
I definitely could have learned from history. There are so many examples of people I know and people in the Bible that I could have learned from. Or at least I could have taken their outcomes and applied them to my life. In most cases I have decided to take the chance and learn from my own mistakes. I do not recommend this method in any manner. Although, I have noticed that when I make a mistake and could only blame myself, I believe I learn the “lesson” in the most personal way.
With that being said, at this moment I feel I am ready to begin an opportunity. This opportunity is actually a dream that began about 5 years ago. It’s amazing how God does give you the desires of your heart. But within this opportunity I fear eyebrows will be raised. This opportunity isn’t the typical approach into the field I am preparing myself to go. I believe people will say, “That isn’t how missions should be done”. Maybe it would be easiest to explain this by just asking you to ask yourself this question. What comes to mind when you think of missions/missionary?
My answer to this question is unfortunately answered with another question. “Why aren’t the things that happen over [there] (on a mission trip) happening over [here]?
Within my question the dream came about that started 5 years ago. I saw something within the context of a mission trip to Mexico. I saw the lives of the people participating on the mission trip affected in a greater way than the people that were actually being served. When I list the things I would like to be involved with concerning ministry I would list them in this manner. 1. Youth ministry. 2. Missions. 3. Pastor. If am honest it would take an act of God for me to decide to be a missionary or a pastor. I believe that act of God has happened within me. My call into missions has been answered by myself without any prompting from other influences. The cool thing is I will still be able to be involved in youth ministry just at a greater distance.
My dream is to inspire others to do the same thing they would do on a mission trip back in their homeland as well.
As I continue to think about missions I continue to think about how to be effective and efficient. I am not burdened to be in a poverty stricken land. I am burdened to be in spiritually lacking land. Living in another country doesn’t scare me. You know what would scare me more than anything? If God gave me a burden to reach wealthy lost Americans. That would be tuff. Think about that! Seriously, think about God calling you to specifically reach wealthy people. Something about a rich man threading through the eye of a needle comes to mind.
I can’t believe that my dream is about to come true. The best thing is that the dream that God has given me is even better than I could have imagined. One of my favorite words is Godspeed. Now, only if I can live by its definition.
Routine Dreams
Mar 24th
I have been trying to wrap my mind around this phenomenon with Benaiah and the lion. By the way, Mark Batterson’s book In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day has been some the best encouragement I have ever read. The book itself, has taught me that all my fears are only excuses. It is a must read.
I tend to make things more difficult and complicated than they really are. I am too analytical. And honestly, as I was breaking down these short statements about Benaiah, I thought “this is way out of context.” I mean cmon’ there is no preface or sequel. I don’t think I can legitimately say that God wanted Benaiah to risk his life by attempting to kill a lion. Maybe details were lost in translation. I don’t know. This week as I attempted to lead our life group through a portion of this story, I left shaking my head. I felt like I did the lesson no justice. I bombed. I concluded that I expect God to be literal with me and learned that this has been a mistake that I have been making for a long time.
No God doesn’t want me to jump into a hole and fight off Africanized wild beasts. But I do believe He wants me to take risks. Not risks in light of dictionary.com’s definition. Yes the definition applies but only partly. Where I don’t agree with this definition is the part about loss or failure. If I am truly taking a risk for God and I fail, God still receives glory because I chased the lion. I wouldn’t fail because I still put Him first. The scenario with Benaiah’s lion ordeal, I believe, was part of his routine. I am not saying that this routine was commonplace within this era but that for some reason Benaiah needed to kill this lion. I don’t think he was legally insane, maybe dangerously crazy, but not coo koo. Otherwise David wouldn’t have put him in a position of leadership, right? Of course these are just assumptions from a rookishly wannabe theologian, made thousands of years after the fact.
Just as if I am studying the Bible, Batterson’s entire book should be read to learn of the common thread within all the characters portrayed. That common thread, I believe, is that all the people spoken of had a fear of God.
Benaiah killed the lion despite the obvious odds in the lions favor. I think it is healthy to say that he trusted in his God given ability. This is the principal that I have been missing. Somewhere within the Bible I have read that God will give me the desires of my heart. And I think it is safe to assume, as long as these desires relate to making Him famous, I am good to go. Benaiah’s battle with the lion had to have God’s involvement. Logically, the lion wins every time in this situation. But not this time. Actually this isn’t the only guy in the Bible who could be labeled as roid user. Other men in the Bible have taken out large animals and outnumbered armies. These men were juiced with a fear of God.
I could go on and on about what this “fear of God” is. But I can’t. I would just ramble. Personally I can only attempt to describe MY fear of God. I believe my “lion” is to follow Him completely while living within a “routine”. I hope this is as easily understood for you as well. Check out Proverbs 19:23 MSG. Try to follow along with the latter because what is in my head doesn’t always come out very well through my finger tips.
Because I know Him, I have learned that I have been commanded to follow Him. As I attempt to follow Him, I screw up. My fear of God, thankfully brings my screw ups to my attention. This fear also convicts me to continue to follow and screw up less often. I have found through trial and error that the less I follow, the more I screw up. To follow Him, is when I put Him first in absolutely EVERYTHING I do. This is what I would describe as my routine. That is, everyone was created to worship Him by serving others first and then give Him the glory. No that wasn’t backwards. Serve Him by putting others first and then give Him the glory. This is where I believe I have failed. I have been putting Him first before others (in that I try to learn and gain from Him for my personal benefit by gaining insight that will help my problems) and honestly most of the time I have cut in line before God. To follow Him, or live my life like Him, I must put everyone else first just as Christ did. Again this is just my rationale. Wouldn’t you say that Christ put others first, even before Himself? If this raises hairs, think about it logically, it is all just a simple cycle that in the end glorifies God. All of the above is just my routine.
My “lion” on the other hand, is my dream. You may label your “lion” as calling. I believe my dream/calling is to take my family and our routine into Latin America. This lion/dream/calling, I believe is the point of Batterson’s book. God even wants our dreams as stated in Psalms 20:4. I think a better way to describe this is, adventure. These adventures are the circumstances that are presented to us within our routines. Good or bad. God wants us to let go of our reasoning and make Him famous by attempting to chase our dreams. If we trust Him and continue to live out our routine, God will do what God does.
Live Your Life
Mar 19th
It amazes me that when anyone hits rock bottom, only good is staring down to help pull them up. Even those far from the G word, realize good trumps evil. I ripped these lyrics off T.I.’s “Live Your Life.” I don’t know about you, but I can see the reflection of Christ’ light beneath the words. What I take from these words, is that I need to make One person famous and forget about absolutely everything else. Check out The Road to Redemption. Just as every follower has hit rock bottom, our debt to Christ for finding that beautiful knowledge, should be to repay Him by loving and serving others.
(T.I.):
Never mind what haters say, ignore them ’til they fade away.
Amazing they ungrateful after all the game I gave away.
Safe to say I paved the way, for you cats to get paid today.
You still be wasting days away now had I never saved the day.
Consider them my protégé, homage I think they should pay.
Instead of being gracious, they violate in a major way.
I never been a hater still I love them, in a crazy way.
Some say they so yay and no they couldn’t get work on Labor day.
It aint that they black or white, their hands a area the shade of grey.
I’m West side anyway, even if I left the day it stayed away.
Some move away to make a way not move away cause they afraid.
I’ll go back to the hood and all you ever did was take away.
I pray for patience but they make me want to melt they face away.
Like I once made them scream, now I could make them plead their case away.
Been thuggin’ all my life, can’t say I don’t deserve to take a break.
You’d rather see me catch a case, and watch my future fade away.
(T.I.):
I’m the opposite of moderate, immaculately polished with the spirit of a hustler and the swagger of a college kid.
Allergic to the counterfeit, impartial to the politics.
Articulate but still would grab a nigga by the collar quick.
Whoever havin problems, with they record sale just holla TIP.
If that don’t work and all else fails, then turn around and follow TIP.
I got love for the game but ay I’m not in love with all of it.
I do without the fame and the rappers nowadays are comedy.
The hootin’ and the hollerin’, back and forth with the arguing.
Where you from, who you know, what you make and what kind of car you in.
Seems as though you lost sight of what’s important with the positive.
And checks until your bank account, and you’re about poverted.
Your values is a disarrayed, prioritizing horribly.
Unhappy with the riches cause you miss-poor morally.
Ignoring all prior advice and fore warning.
And we mighty full of ourselves all of a sudden aren’t we?
Jump
Mar 16th
I have been nudged. Nudged to take my family and jump. I am scared. I am not emotional. But yesterday I was broken. I felt a huge shoving from God. It’s hard to explain through words what I feel deep in my gut, heart, and mind. Have you ever been in a church service and felt as if you are the only one in the audience. Well, I have felt this way for the last few months.
I know God wants not just me but my family as well, to be serving Him within the capacity of missions. I have ran from this guidance for a long long time. I have tried to hide behind other good works. I even started a pursuit at a masters degree in theology to buy more time. Nope, that didn’t help either. Yesterday, I drove to a remote area to try and hear God. Know what I felt Him trying to tell me? “I have nothing else to say until you go.” You see, I know what He wants from me. Heck, He has even given me a dream that excites me. And I still question.
Here is what I am afraid of. I am afraid that I am not good enough. Because I have ran for so long, why would He want to still use me? Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. I am afraid to ask for help as well.
And now, I have this incredible opportunity that has only risen due to God. This opportunity would allow us to minister to a local people and inspire others to do the same. And the people that are knee deep within the ministry are totally rad. I was really fearful that if I became a missionary, I would have to get a new wardrobe, part my hair, grow a mustache, burn my iPod, start collecting white button up shirts and ties. But the people of 6:8 are so genuine, funny, and normal. I could be myself. If you know me, you know that I ain’t changing my personality to please anyone.
So what does this mean? What am I trying to say? I am asking for prayer. I believe God has given us the opportunity to partner with 6:8 Ministries. You’re right, I could be wrong about this whole thing. After a conversation I had with the leadership of the ministry, I don’t think I will ever be 100% sure that this is part of God’s plan. I want this to happen. I believe it can happen. And for crying out loud, What is the worst that could happen!?
I am asking for prayer. If I could take it one step further, may I ask you to pray for my feet. I have heard his voice but I haven’t done anything yet. All I have done is recognized His call. I still have to jump.
Brave
Mar 1st
David, Peter, Abraham, Noah, and Ehud are just a few brave men spoke of in the bible. I have seen the thought of brave men portrayed through films such as Braveheart, Gladiator, Die Hard, Patriot and the like. I have heard of the stories of the courageous responders during 9/11. My father was a fire fighter who risked his life for others as an occupation.
But until now I have never personally known someone who could be labeled as brave. I know someone who is a risk taker. This person isn’t trying to become famous. This person is trying to make someone famous.
This person is my pastor. Bryson Butts is brave. Bryson Butts wants you to know and have an incredible relationship with Christ. I want to be like Jesus but I also want to be brave with my knowledge of Jesus just like Bryson Butts.
Look out ICT. Get scared satan. There is a mob of crazy God fearers, who has a brave leader, infiltrating the city of Wichita with God’s love.
