Posts tagged confession
Tiger Woods did it, now it’s our turn to apologize.
Feb 19th
Tiger Woods stepped up. I don’t feel he needed to publicly apologize to us, as fans. But he did.
Now, I am thinking, “Who do I need to apologize to?” How about you? Because I don’t think that only “big” mistakes deserve apologies.
We'll get em next time…
Jul 9th
Have you ever looked deep within yourself? I mean when it happens unintentionally and it’s the last thing you expected to happen. Like when you’re watching a movie and the suspense builds and then bam, Rocky is being tormented by the loss of Apollo. Is there a better encouraging movie character than Rocky? He is always the underdog and I always root for the underdog. I have never viewed myself more than an underdog. I have demons that always seem to keep me from being more. Personally, I have dealt with depression, anxiety, and failure.
I don’t know why I allow these things to sneak up on me.
Yes, I believe these emotions can be prevented. No, I personally won’t take medication to aid myself.
For me I wonder if this happens as a reality check. Like the valley. The mountains aren’t as sweet if you have never stood at the bottom and were forced to look up. I have always likened my life to one of those air filled clowns with weight at the bottom. You know those punching bags for kids that when you punch it, it comes back. I don’t see myself as the punching bag but as the one throwing the punches. Have you ever seen a little kid hit one of those bags and then the clown pops right back up and knocks the kid over?
I always try to control everything. I can throw punches at life over and over and keep the clown at bay but eventually this lifestyle wears me down. And before I know it the bag always comes back and knocks me down. I’m being literal here. I try to control God and like a great boxer he lets me swing, knowing that he will tire me out. He’s the patient one. His patience is where I find peace because I always know he’s in my corner ready to take my mouthpiece out, wipe off my blood, and pat me on the back.
Cool Like Fonzie
May 18th
to be cool or not to be cool. How many people play this option out for everyday activities? I do. I always try to be different than everyone else. It’s a flaw. I want to stand out. For instance:
I will not wear clothes with the name brand publicized boldly. No american eagle, ambercrombie, and definitely no hollister pimping here. I like to buy my clothes from buckle.com. I search for the weird stuff. Luckily my legs are too big and I can’t fit into skinny jeans. I wouldn’t have been cool in the 80’s.
I used to be a Red Sox fan. Before the championship. You know why I rooted for them? Because they sucked. Now everyone wears a Red Sox hat and I refuse to be categorized as a band wagon fan. Now it’s all about the Royals baby.
Music. If it’s on the radio, I am not a big fan. I am an independent label fan. It’s less commercialized and that’s cool with me.
Basically if everybody is doing “it”, I am doing my dandiest to make my own path. Sadly, I am beginning to realize that this mindset is becoming the cool way of thinking. I’m doomed.
Since it’s not cool to be a hardcore follower, you would think that I am Christianity’s go to guy. Nope, this is one thing that makes me uncool.
Confession
Apr 30th
I have to get this out into the open. There is someone else. I know, I know, I am married. But I have to share this. I am in love. In love with someone else. Yes, I still love my wife. But this other person challenges me. This other person pushes me. I feel incredibly loved by this person. I don’t know how this happened. It all started kind of matter of factly. One thing lead to another. Before I knew it, I felt like I was dating again. I would feel nervous at first but then I became comforted. I am able to be myself. It’s strange because I don’t feel guilty in any manner. It wasn’t hard to hide, actually it was quite easy. I remember thinking, “how can I be loved this much?” It’s not the first time I have been involved with another. This time is different though. There is chemistry and excitement. This other person isn’t flawless. The grass on the other side didn’t look greener, so to speak. This person was there waiting. This person was willing to give. This person expected nothing in return. The coolest part about this whole entanglement of relationships is that my wife is understanding about the whole situation. Oddly enough, this was meant to be. I never realized I could love anything or anybody as much as I love my wife but I do. This person I am speaking is Gracepoint Community Church. Shame on you for thinking I was a dog. I love my church. I love how much this church loves anyone else as well. It’s hard for me not to describe Gracepoint as “my” church. I am so proud of the church as a whole. It’s not perfect but it doesn’t try to be. Gracepoint is a beautiful mess of real people.
I think I might have OCD
Apr 16th
When I peel a banana I insist on tearing down the creases.
When I remove a switch plate to paint, I am meticulous about not scratching the screw heads paint. Of course after a few times of removing the plate, this is impossible. I just changed every socket and light plate within the upstairs of our home.
I check every expiration date on anything I think about putting in my mouth. If it expires today, trash. If it expires tomorrow I will smell it and have a little taste test. I do not eat two day later leftovers!
If I am reading and come across a word that I do not know it’s definition, I must look it up.
I will not use a 0.5mm mechanical pencil. It must be 0.7mm.
When loading the dishwasher all utensils must be facing up.
I adjust the bass, treble, and fade differently on each song I listen to create the best sound quality.
